Reluctant Angel

There is a photo doing the rounds at the moment on social media which shows an exasperated guardian angel with her head in her hands and the caption reads something like, “This is what my guardian angel must feel like some days.” This got me to thinking what it would be like if our guardian angels possessed human characteristics.

I feel sure that my own guardian angel would be tearing her hair out. I always begin the day well enough. Despite my usual reluctance to get out of bed, once I am showered and I´ve had a cuppa, I am almost human and I always ensure that I have thirty minutes in which to meditate, feel grateful and visualize before I go to work. At this stage my guardian angel must be whoop whooping for joy at my impressive start and my good intentions….but then I come down off the roof garden where I do my meditation to find that the house is in chaos, my little one is standing in the living room naked with one shoe on, transfixed by something on his ipad and my oldest one hasn´t even had his cornflakes yet and if we don´t leave in the next nanosecond, I will be late for work yet again. My zen-like calm of only ten seconds ago is shattered as I shout like a banshee at my surprised kids and whip round the house like a tornado picking up socks from the sofa and collecting the piece of jam toast which is hanging precariously from the net curtain. My poor guardian angel at this stage has her head in her hands. I feel her disappointment at the sudden change in my temperament and I focus on my breathing for a few seconds – (and in – one, two, three; and out – one, two, three). My inner peace is almost restored and the journey to work is uneventful.

I arrive at work only a few minutes late and nobody has really noticed my absence. So far, so good. I shrug one arm out of my coat; the telephone rings and a customer arrives at my desk simultaneously. With coat half on and half off, I pick up the phone holding it under the crook in my neck. The customer standing before me announces they are in a rush but wants to pay for three separate items and they only have a 100€ note. Of course, having cashed up last night, there is not a cent of change in the building. Still with my coat dragging on the floor and the phone nestled under my neck, I go in search of change. My poor angel at this stage is jumping up and down on my shoulder ordering me to find my inner serenity. I decide to try for a few more deep breaths but in my haste, it sounds more like hyperventilating. (and in – one, two, three; and out – one, two, three) Needless to say, I finally manage to remove my coat, find some change and sort out the phone call and it all gets done in perfect timing. I won´t bore you with the rest of my working day but suffice to say it continues in a similar vein for the entire day and I am left wondering what on earth has been achieved by the end of it.

Nevertheless, despite my somewhat wobbly start, because I spent time visualizing my perfect life first thing in the morning, my angel decides to organise a few synchronicities for me that only a fool would miss. She sends me a customer who, unbeknown to me, is a website designer and online marketer who can help me with my own website. As I am busy when he comes in the door, I talk to him very briefly and by the time he leaves my office, I haven´t even discovered that he is a web designer. My guardian angel shakes her head in disbelief. She gets back on the phone to ¨angel headquarters¨ and has to explain to them that I have completely missed a golden opportunity and can they please arrange for another happy coincidence at the earliest convenience. There is a lot of general tutting at angel HQ but they agree to arrange a second possibility for me.

My angel, being the very charitable and non-judgmental person that she is, decides that, even though there have been a few “lapses” in my positivity during the busy working day, she will send me some signs to cheer me up and help me to understand that she has my back. As I walk out to my car, a beautiful flurry of butterflies swoops majestically in front of me to remind me that my angels are near. However, my angel didn´t take into account that my youngest boy is petrified of bugs. The butterflies dance, daintily in front of us with the grace of – well – a butterfly. My near hysterical son flaps his arms about like a windmill and the bewildered butterflies decide to make a hasty retreat whilst they still can. My angel at this stage is in despair.

At the end of a busy day, I lay back in a hot tub of bubbles surrounded by scented candles and contemplate my day and my successes. I am blissfully unaware of how hard my angel has worked to organise my day. But despite my lack of appreciation for all her efforts she remains determined to surprise me with yet more messages and synchronicities for tomorrow. She gets back on the blower to “Angel Central” to see what can be arranged for a hopeless case at such short notice.

So I would like to take this opportunity to say to my angel, “Thank you for being with me even when I am not with you. Being human can be a little challenging from time to time but that does not mean that I don´t appreciate all the effort you put in on my behalf, and in those moments of clarity when you and I are one, during meditation and at other moments throughout the day, we both know that this journey we both embarked upon together is well worth it with all of its ups and downs.” Thank you my blessèd angel xx

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